Treme-ing My Pants (Not Really, Not Yet)

I realize it is pronounced "Treh-MAY." For the purposes of wordplay in the lede, I was hoping that you didn't. If you did know the correct pronunciation, pretend it says "HBO's Treme? A-Okay!" up there. Pulitzer.

So, I'm watching the series premiere for Treme, for the second time, tonight. The first time I watched it, when it first aired, I was very distracted. And drunk. This time, I am only drunk, so I am able to give it an appropriate amount of my attention. Herein lies my live-ish blogging of theTreme premiere, a solid week after the fact. I would joke about how untimely this "live-blog" is, but no one is reading, anyway. Here we go:

When I (re)begin watching the pilot, my first impression is that I don't understand a lot/most/any of what is being said. I feel racist. Yet again, I worry that I am not a very good Blackperson, since I can't really understand what these colored gentlemen are discussing.

A few minutes in, Wendell Pierce (THE BUNK) expresses enthusiasm about making some "mother fucking money." I understand that. 10 Blackpoints. Pierce looks fairly authoritative wielding a trombone. I think I read one time that he really knows how to play it.*

Then, Steve Zahn's ass. No, thank you. Also, while I have more or less deduced what a "second line" is at this point, I certainly do not know why it is called that. (Perhaps there is a "first line" that is not pertinent down in the Treme?)

Relationships are being established, and I'm finding it a little tedious. It is my own fault. I'm already expecting the familiarity awarded to a devoted viewer of a series in medias res, wherein exposition is already shorthand or avoided entirely. I remind myself I am not watching The Wire, season 3. David Simon must have felt there was a very important reason to show me Steve Zahn's ass right now-- a reason I may forever be too stupid to grasp. It is easy to sustain idol worship, as long as you never concede that your idol's intelligence is within your grasp.

24 minutes in, and Zahn is now shirtless for the second time. I maintain, no, thank you. Not for me. I guess I'm supposed to be learning a lot about his character from all this. Also, Zahn is playing Mystikal very loud and trying to annoy his neighbors for reasons yet to be revealed.

Clarke Peters (COOL LESTER SMOOTH) has shown up a couple times now. Much like his character's introduction scenes in The Wire, it seems Simon and co-creator Eric Overmyer have stuck to the "Show. Don't tell" screenwriters' credo/cliche. Peters hasn't said much and we don't know much about his character's deal yet, but he's been given a good deal of business in just two or three scenes. Right now he's mopping in a bar or something, with major gravitas. Inner turmoil!

A lot more stuff has happened since the mopping, and also not very much at all. Lester's kids are grownups, and they are annoyed by him; but, they are still giving him unsolicited help. Lester doesn't say much to his whiney kids, or anyone for that matter. He mostly just does the stern I'm-set-in-my-ways face, and people acquiesce to whatever he's doing, even though he is sometimes dressed up like an "If They Mated" of Don Magic Juan crossed with Big Bird.

The Bunk (in case you have not noticed, I am not learning nor bothering to look up anyone's Treme character names, at this point) has taken three cab rides in this episode, even though he could not afford any of them. I think he should stop taking cabs.

Well, it's over now. The pilot was fine. You know, pretty good as far as TV goes, but unable to meet the impossibly high bar set by 5 seasons of the Greatest Show of All Time, The Wire. (Not yet.) I'm looking forward to seeing more Treme. And, HBO has already picked it up for a second season, so that's exciting.

Hopefully, going forward, there will be less Zahn ass.

*He doesn't. But, he is taking lessons for the show.

Now, This Is Happening

We've already been over my love of HBO's The Wire, and my bottomless contempt for those who "don't get it." However, I will freely admit Walter Cronkite biting the big one yesterday isn't exactly a cause for pause, let alone an LTNA post, as I'm under the age of 60 (barely), and don't really have any thoughts on the matter. Frankly, I think the guy had a pretty decent run. I mean, he was 92 frickin' years old. Besides, dying "suddenly" is so last month. 

Taking all that into account, along with the fact that I am quite certain no one wants to hear my thoughts on the current situation in Pakistan (more to the point, I have no thoughts on Pakistan because I am willfully ignorant on the matter), I'm just going to remind the world-- i.e., Carl, the person who reads this blog (hey pal!)-- that The Wire is televised manna. I haven't blogged much this week because there's not been much for me to talk about; but, I figure, why let that stop me, when I can regurgitate material from posts of yore?

I've been re-watching The Wire in its entirety over the past couple of weeks. If you're a Wire fan, you undoubtedly realize that saying "in its entirety" is slightly redundant, because that is the only way to watch The Wire. Once you watch one episode, your life is pretty much fucked for the next month, because you realize the entire 60 hours of the saga deserve review. It can't be helped. 

As soon as I wrap up this pathetic excuse for a blog post, I'll be firing up the old DVD machine and finishing up Season 3 along with my case of Sam Adams Light. Yup, home alone on a Saturday night with McNulty and the gang keeping me company through my teevee. Don't be jealous. 

The only way to make my night more awesome would be to fall asleep while eating a waffle sundae and crying. However, I just did that Thursday night, and I pride myself on being unpredictable. Translation: I will most likely wake up in my laundry basket tomorrow afternoon, amidst the detritus of a McGangBang with a side of self loathing, while Montell Jordan's "This Is How We Do It" plays on repeat through my iTunes. I love the weekend!

Things with More Appeal.15

I've been trying to decide what to talk about today for a little while. I've been pretty ambivalent toward gossip fodder these days, which, of course, used to be the bread and vegemite of LTNA. But, I guess somewhere along the way I stopped giving a shit about any of it, and realized I probably never really did in the first place. After all, how many times can you tell that old joke about how when you stick your hand under Paris Hilton's skirt, it feels like you're feeding a pony? Seventy three is the answer, and in my two and a half years of zealous, turned sporadic, turned absent, turned semi-zealous again writing of this blog, I have reached my quota.

Still, I do like to think of this as an entertainment and showbusiness-oriented virtual soapbox, or "demiblog" if you will, so that explains the nonsensical hodgepodge of miscellany in the recent posts you see below. And, in keeping with that, here is a new installment of Things with More Appeal, on a Wednesday as LTNA tradition mandates. This week's Thing happens to be The Greatest TV Show of All Time: The Wire.

If you've never seen The Wire, do so. That's pretty much all I can say to you, because describing why is futile. Watching the show is the only way to give it its due justice, and my hackneyed praises would merely sully it's luminous splendor.

If you have seen The Wire, and simply didn't care for the show, that is repugnant and inconceivable, and you can get the fuck out of here. For real, son. I have a no re-re policy on this one.

It is nearly December, and the fourth season of The Wire is being released on DVD this Tuesday, December 4th. That gives you ample time to get that Netflix queue in order so you can catch up, in preparation for the 5th and final season, premiering Sunday, January 6th on HBO. Better yet, take advantage of some of the holiday sales going on and just buy the first four seasons on DVD if you don't already have them. I know HBO DVDs don't come cheap, but you won't regret it. And, if you do regret it, then you're a fucking imbecile and you have larger issues to handle.

I cannot tell you how much I've been looking forward to the conclusion of this show, but this post should give a fair indication. I'll be posting more about The Wire as we get closer to the premiere, and more news and videos begin to surface. There are already five teasers I've managed to find, so check out the ones for McNulty and Marlo if you're curious. Courtesy of YouTube, everyone's favorite content pirates, please find one of the teasers for the new season below, featuring everyone's favorite stick-up boy, Omar Little. While it's the most brief teaser of the five, the blue balls of anticipation it manages to build for the new season hurt so good, and make it a real success. So get ready to cough up some blood and enjoy!