According to someone who overheard someone else who read about someone who read this one magazine, Angelina Jolie admitted to some Dominican Republican charity aid worker that she is, in fact, pregnant. We've ignored the incessant rumors of this the same way we ignored the rumors of the Nick and Jessica Simpson split, at least until the point where it sort of seemed a little true.
After all, Angelina has been covering her belly with frying pans and infants and such, whenever she's out in public lately. And, poor Maddox has had to become accustomed to walking on his very own legs, since Jolie hasn't been carrying him like she used to (she shouldn't be allowed to have more children, the barbarian!).
In any case, she does look pretty knocked up in the picture on the cover of People, so like, there that is. So, it looks like by the summer, the hottest human being ever will be born. Or, if God has the penchant for cruel irony we think he does, the most hideous human being ever will burst forth from Angelina Jolie's enchanted womb. Either way, it should be pretty amusing.
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