12 July 2006

Michael Douglas Is the New R. Kelly


During a recent day at the beach, Michael Douglas was stung on his back by a jellyfish, and had his son piss on his back. Quoth Douglas, "I don't know if it helped at all, but my son was happy."

I can't think of anyone who wouldn't be happy, once offered the opportunity to piss on Michael Douglas. But, I guess this is one pleasure bestowed upon blood relatives, only.

More to the point, I think we all know having his son piss on his back had nothing to do with this supposed "jellyfish," but, rather, is one manifestation of Michael "Golden Shower" Douglas' many perversions. Sure, I've heard of the whole "pee pee cures jellyfish stings" helouise approach to the problem, but look at Michael Douglas up there. Dirty old man. I can only imagine what his "cure" is for a dog bite, or a stab wound. That's right: doo doo butter.

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