14 July 2006

Brit-Fed Only Want to Look Like They're on Welfare


Even though Britney Spears got pregnant almost immediately after birthing her first fucktard, she doesn't want you to think that she won't be making a glorious comeback after she shits out her second. She and K-Fed fully intend to have their music careers reach the impossible heights of their talents.

Indeed, Britney says "After this baby, I'm going to get intense with it." I'm not sure what the hell that's supposed to mean, but it sounds like a threat. Regardless, I'm pretty sure she's setting herself up for some serious fucking disappointment.

K-Fed, on the other hand, seems to be continuing to prove he is a mastermind of living off the rich without deserving it, amassing a whopping $700 Gs in the last four months, supposedly.

"[K-Fed 'earns'] an estimated $250,000 for endorsing clothing line Blue Marlin and $25,000 per day to hawk such products as Virgin Mobile cell phones, where he made his infamous plea to save the penny. He'’s negotiating to sign a deal with Jive Records, which happens to be Spears'’ label, for $300,000 per album, and he also hopes to bring out his own line of jeans and beach jewelry."

Yes. "Beach jewelry."

Of course, considering that Britney Spears is seemingly incapable of remembering to take a birth control pill every day (or "I-don't-want-no-babies-no-more pills," as she calls them), I'm going to start taking bets that she'll be knocked up, yet again, by 2008. Too bad for Britney they don't make Ortho-Tricyclen in Flintstone's chewables.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

"beach jewelry" isn't even a category on our site. And we have like over 20,000 categories!