10 October 2005

Immaculate Conception Would've Been More Believable

We're gone for three freaking days, and of course one of the biggest stories to break since we emerged from nothingness into mediocrity hits the wire almost immediately. We're sure you've already heard about it. Yes, the mythical mini-Cruise festering in Katie Holmes' supposedly virginal womb. Did we say "totally made-up publicity stunt fetus," Mr. High-Powered Lawyer? You must have heard us wrong. What we said was "really real bundle of joy from everyone's favorite totally in un-fake love couple, comprised of a heterosexual man and woman. Did we mention the part about HETEROSEXUAL?" Okay, Mr. Lawyer? As long as we're all on the same non-litigious page.

The newer news in the TomKat saga is simply that they've done yet another crazy thing that is marginally surprising, but also kind of not, because nothing they can do really is any more. "Kate" has fired her publicist of 9 years, only to follow Cruise's example of hiring Lee Anne DeVette, his publisister. The couple is taking steps to "sever all ties with non-Scientologists," which we completely understand and find wholly unweird and perfectly sane, and we're sure "Kate's" non-Scientologist family and friends would agree. We are so happy for Hollywood's most realistic in-love-to-the-maximum-extreme power couple, and if you're not, you're being a glib asshole.

1 comment:

Marcia said...

I personally think that Katie's not pregnant, it's all a hoax. I predict that she miscarries within 2 months. It will be tragic. But it will be fake.

I found your blog by hitting "next blog" a bunch of times... and we've blogged about the exact same things - george michael, tomKat's pregnancy, etc. I am def. coming back here! You should check mine out, too....