08 September 2005

We Refuse to Put a Tom Cruise Pun Here

In case you thought TomKat was finished jumping the couch, it just got even creepier. The depths of Katie Holmes' bainwashing have gotten deeper (or perhaps they added another couple of zeroes to that check-- erm, we mean, perhaps she's fallen even deeper in love with her heterosexual, amazing, amazing man), as she now wants to go by Kate Cruise, once she starts bearding-- uh, that is, once she marries Tom. Yes, not only does she want to take his last name, but she wants to be called Kate, as that's what Tom calls her. We noticed this peculiarity when he went on Oprah, at the very beginning of this whole charade-- we mean, love parade. Wow. The Tourettes is really acting up today! Sorry 'bout that, you pigfuckingcocksucker! Ahem.

Yeah, so in conclusion, they're just really in love, and there's nothing wrong with that. Right, Tom Cruise's lawyers? We all agree, and we're personally super happy for them.

[Source: In Touch via The Superficial]

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