15 September 2005

Jersey Is the Worst Place on Earth

At least three mice escaped from a lab in New Jersey. (Evidently, even mice are smarter than Jersey residents with regard to how shitty a place "The Garden State" is, and know you get the fuck out at the first opportunity.)

The problem, though, is the mice were infected with the plague. The fucking plague, man. The FBI is saying the escaped mice shouldn't really be a threat, since there are no indications of terrorism, and the mice probably died quickly. That's comforting, yeah?

It's news to us that they even still have the plague-- we thought that went out ages ago, along with dying of "consumption" and surgery without anesthesia. What is not surprising, however, is that if there still is the plague, of course it would reside in fucking Jersey with the rest of the gum-chewing, teased-hair, bridge and tunnel trash. Gawd we hate Jersey.

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