Things with More Appeal.5

It's about that time, lover. Time for us to suggest some Thing that we think may enrich your life. This week, we decided to stray from our trusty comedy/ pop culture stock, and recommend an actual factual book-- with pages!

Sorry if you thought the picture above meant that this week's recommended Thing was that Ponderosa by Green Acres (big ups if you're from Queens and understand that reference). We haven't been there since that time we went with our brother and Dad after seeing He-Man: Masters of the Universe for the second time at the neighboring theater, and recent visits home have shown it's fallen to severe disrepair.

But, let's get on with it. This week's Thing is a book called The Meat You Eat: How Corporate Farming Has Endangered America's Food Supply by a guy named Wendell Berry. Now, before you jump to any conclusions about this being more of our hippy bullshit, keep in mind that most hippies are too busy not showering to maintain a blog. Second, we happen to eat meat, so this isn't some underhanded way of trying to promote vegetarianism or veganism. Well, we don't dig on swine, but it's just 'cause that shit is gross.

What this book is about is the factory farming practices in the United States, and if you're too busy enjoying your ignorance to read Fast Food Nation (which you really, really should), you should at least have the self respect to have a cursory knowledge of what you're shoving down your steak and kidney pie-hole. If anything, this book will gross you out enough to make better decisions which will definitely behoove you and your health in the end. Not to mention taking down those capitalist pigs, one citizen buy one (up yours, Ray Kroc!). Yeah!

You don't even have to buy it, if you don't want to. We didn't. This book and other titles are available at your local library! Come on. Give a hoot, as The Bible suggests. (Wasn't that The Bible? "Leviticus 4: something or other?) You owe it to yourself to find out what the fuck they're putting in our food. There's a reason Whole Foods sells something as esoteric as "Organic Free-Range Grass Fed Beef," and there's a reason people like us buy it. Haven't you ever noticed that no one would ever eat a McNugget without that crispy, delicious breading? Or would anyone ever eat a Big Mac without 3 Kamikazes, two Hurricanes and an Adios at 4 a.m. when everything else is closed? Then put down that burger and start reading. Wuv yourself and much as we wuv you, sweetums.

xxxoxxxo