If you're anything like us, the news of Natasha Lyonne being "found" in Beth Israel Hospital last week was doubly significant, as we were unaware that she had been missing in the first place. Well evidently, that Bermuda Triangle she fell into was a pretty fucked up place, because N.L. came out of it with a collapsed lung, a heart infection, track marks and Hepatitis C, according to today's reports. And those are probably just the appetizers. Maybe that "Bermuda Triangle" was just Tommy Lee's pants. They're not yet saying whether heroin addiction is to blame for the Hep, let alone the methadone they're giving her. But, that's a lot like saying you're unsure if your steady diet of bacon smoothies is to blame for an unexpected 80 lb. weight gain.
Geez, Nat-a-tat-tat. We didn't realize things had gotten so bad for ya. You know your shit's fucked up when Tara Reid's life looks put-together, by comparison.
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