22 August 2005

Monkeys Go Ape for Slots

We already knew that monkeys= a good time. And, the only thing better than a bunch of monkeys is a bunch of drunk and/or stoned monkeys. But, a new study promises previously untold possibilities of hilarity: drunken, stoner monkeys with a gambling problem. A study at Duke University, wherein monkeys were given the chance to gamble to receive juice rewards in varying amounts, or pick the "safe" option which gave the same amount of juice every time, showed the monkeys overwhelmingly preferred to roll the dice, as it were. The scienticians plan to use this data to learn more about gambling addiction and other boring stuff.

If you ask us, this study just reaffirms via monkey what we already knew, regarding why humans like to gamble: That shit is fun! We can't wait to head to Vegas with an actual barrel of monkeys. Slutty monkeys.


london cokehead said...

Gwad , there's nothing like studying the totally obvious ...

Suppose they've gotta do somethig to get that PhD ?

LTNA said...

Yeah, right along with researching why monkeys like to masturbate. It's a two-part study.